Quotes

"It is a well known fact that those people who most want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it.”
– Douglas Adams​ (Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy)

"She was like a candle in the wind... unreliable"
- Dean Learner (Richard Ayoade on Garth Marenghi's Darkplace)

"Holiday!" (quoting Madonna) / "I need a miracle" (quoting Fragma)
- Davide Arnone

"Let the jacket seal the potato"
- Ed Sitch (quoting Take Me Out)

Be so good that they can't ignore you.
- Steve Martin

Shooter Migavin - "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast"
Happy Gilmore - "You eat shit for breakfast?"
- Adam Sandler

On Trivial Pursuit: "You know, that game we played... Question Cheese?"
- Cindy

Living is an art it's not a science; you make it up as you go along, and I think that's what it's all about.
- Al Hirschfield

Do... or do not. There is no try.
- Yoda.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world, not even our troubles.
- Charlie Chaplin

Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch.
- Orson Welles

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.
- Confucius

A squid eating dough in a polyethylene bag is fast 'n' bulbous, got me?
- Don Van Vliet aka Captain Beefheart

There's a story about a seriously depressed man in Germany who went to see a psychiatrist:
The psychiatrist says, "You've lost your sense of humour in life you need to have a really good laugh. Go to the circus - there's this great clown, Grock, the funniest man you've ever seen."
The answer comes back, "I AM Grock."
- Richard Williams (on acting)

Start with the things that you know and the things that are unknown will be revealed to you
- Rembrandt

The most powerful thing in the whole universe, is just behind your nose
- Anon

Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
- Randy Pausch

I never stopped to think of it before, but you know - a policeman will just stand there 'n let a banker rob a farmer, or a finance man rob a workin' man. But if a farmer robs a banker - you would have a whole darn army of cops out'a shooting at him. Robbery is a chapter in etiquette.
- Woody Guthrie

A wild and crazy guy
- Steve Martin

At the moment of commitment, the universe conspires to assist you
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A day without laughter is a day wasted
- Charlie Chaplin